This is very relatable, as is usual with your writing. Seven months ago I moved with my daughter to another continent where I don’t speak the language very well. Because of my circumstance, I rarely get out of the house for socializing, and one of the results has been no sex for about 6 months, with no end in sight. I’ve recently experienced some very similar feelings to what you describe here; I’m considering the reality that my “shared-sex” life is perhaps over forever, that perhaps sex is really more of a nuisance, perhaps sex is really for just the young, how would I possibly be able to tolerate the dance and game involved in dealing with someone else, maybe a life a celibacy is best so I can focus on other things, am I past the age of sex and now no one that I’ll be interested in will be interested in me? do I actually need sex? Why do I believe that I do need it? Do I even really like it? How the fuck could I ever go back to doing it now when I can barely remember what it’s even like? As it is for most of us, there will be a day that is going to be the last day we ever have sex, perhaps that day has come? Do I even want to deal with it, or am I just asking myself these things because I want it but feel like I can’t get it? These are all interesting thoughts to have, and I’m not judging them, I’m just going along for the ride. But I think one thing is certain, not having sex with someone else for a long period of time has actually been quite enlightening and therapeutic in a way, and the longer I go without, I think the more discerning I might be about who I would do it with, and I find myself absolutely without motivation to find someone to have sex with. Thanks for writing this article, it takes courage, but it’s an important conversation to all the sex literature out there.

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Trying to tell the truth, and be truthful about it.

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